Outrageous

If being good isn't working - try being outrageous.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth.
- John F. Kennedy

The greatest mistake you can make in life
is to be continually fearing you will make one.
- Elbert Hubbard

This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare

Let today be the day you begin to make choices about the direction of your life without regard to any petty expectations by others. [By "petty" expectations, I mean expectations that come primarily from habit.]

*** Today's picture comes from a set of 14 Inspirational Posters with words and calligraphy by my dear friend Mary Anne Radmacher and art by my wife Suze Stewart Huie. These posters are available at very special prices. To see these inspirational posters, go to
www.jonathanlockwoodhuie.com/inspirational-posters

Further reading: Expectations

Perspective on Tradition: An Open Mind

Appreciate the Unexpected

Assumptions

Quotes about Being Bold

You Can Do It Quotes

Strength Quotes

Self Esteem Quotes

Positive Quotes

Disappointment

Expectation is the root of all heartache.
- William Shakespeare

Never succumb to the temptation of bitterness.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

People generally complain about only two things:
when they have less than yesterday,
and when they have less than their neighbor.
- jlh

Before you say, "no, no, that isn't true," consider that having a pain today is having less good health than yesterday, and aging is having less youth than yesterday.

Choose to be as a young child - fully awake, eager for the next experience.
- jlh

As we age, we experience disappointments, and then develop a fear of the unfamiliar. Consciously adopt the mindset of a young child, to whom all of life is a grand adventure.

Further reading: Zero-Based Gratitude

Assumptions

Expectations

Comparison - Cause of Unhappiness

What is a New Beginning? (read both the article and the quotes)

Hope Quotes

Uplifting Quotes

Starting Over Quotes

Appreciate the Unexpected

Appreciate the Unexpected

Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get. - the movie Forrest Gump

We humans feel an instinctive need to know what is coming next - what we can count upon. While this is especially true when we are expecting something great, the tendency to want predictability is universal. If we are expecting our spouse to arrive home from the grocery store with a pound of hamburger and they show up with a steak, we may not be pleased with the special treat, but rather set off balance and therefore mildly upset by the surprise.

Consider that one of the dictionary meanings of the word "expect" is "demand." The path to happiness is to avoid making demands upon the world, and especially to avoid making demands upon the future.

Life is never predictable, and that is great with me. Boredom is not my preference. I really like the analogy of life to a box of chocolates because it reminds me that what I actually get is likely to be as sweet or sweeter than what I "expected," just different.

Today's affirmation...
I cherish the uncertainty of life's adventures. - jlh

*** Today's inspiring book from my affiliate Simple Truths is Dreams are Whispers From the Soul with FREE DVD. You can watch the beautiful DVD movie for free before you decide to purchase the book with DVD.

Further reading: Helen Keller: Life is either a daring adventure or nothing

I have no need to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for me. - jlh

Intention versus Expectation (Demand)

Life is like a box of chocolates. - Forrest Gump

Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump

What a positive upbeat way to describe the uncertainty of life. I have no idea what life will give me next, but whatever it is, it will be sweet.

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Films of the month: The Gift and The Cake Eaters (Watch the trailer, then just pay S&H with Free trial)

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Further reading: Aesop's Fables: The Miller, His Son, and the Ass

Elbert Hubbard quote: Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Living Your Inspired Life - video

I have no need to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for me. - Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I have no need to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I received a couple of comments describing yesterday's message as "disgusting," and "offensive." I apologize if anyone felt offended, it was certainly not my intention to insult anyone or to suggest that life is less than difficult for anyone.

The issue with my message, as one writer put it... "In this day and age, women are 'expected' to work outside the home as well as care for the children, husband and home....get the meals, do the laundry, etc. Perhaps they are incredibly tired, find little time for them to get back to a peaceful state of mind as they are expected to carry so many loads."

I agree. Those are the generally accepted expectations of American society.

But what next?

One choice is to suffer, the other choice is to seek joy.

So how to seek joy?

Sometimes joy can be found in striving to make changes, and sometimes it is better attained through acceptance. This is well said in the Serenity Prayer...

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr

Whether you opt to seek change, or to accept, choose joy.

Each of us has a choice in all matters. There is nothing that any of us ever HAVE to do. Each of us, man or woman, chooses the roles we play, and what we make of our lives at each instant. Expectation and Tradition are burdens we take upon ourselves, or choose to throw off.

Does this mean becoming selfish? Not at all, it means becoming selective. It always means doing what we believe is right, regardless of the expectations of others.

As an example, imagine that our aging parent needs our help. There are three courses we can steer: #1. Care for them, but grumble and complain about how unfair and burdensome life is, how we are expected to provide assistance, and how unhappy it makes us to care for our mom. #2. Choose to make other arrangements for mom's care. #3. Be of service to mom because we CHOOSE to make a free-will gift of our time, energy and love.

I propose that #2 is preferable to #1. Visualizing myself as an aging parent (which doesn't take a lot of imagining), I wouldn't want an unhappy person around me who thought I was a burden. Naturally, I believe that #3 is the best option. But the way to get to #3 is to understand that #2 is also a choice. Unless we truly believe that #2 is an option, we can't reach #3, and we get stuck with #1, feeling resentful and victimized.

Life isn't fair. We can't choose our circumstances. But we can choose happiness, or not.

Conscious choices are NOT easy. It is much easier to believe that we are tossed about helplessly on the ocean of circumstances.

Expectations (Demands) suck the juice out of life. Don't believe that you are bound by other's demands. You do not have to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for you.

Further reading: Intention versus Expectation (Demand)

The path of the adventurer is a path of joy - jlh

Why I Choose to Believe that Others are Never the Cause of My Unhappiness

Resilience is about believing in yourself, and trusting your own wisdom rather than being swayed by the opinions of others.

Intention versus Expectation (Demand)

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr

There is an important distinction between the intentions we hold for our inspired future, and the demands (expectations) we tend to place on ordinary life.

We need to create a balance between accepting what life hands us, and working diligently to create the best life we can. We shouldn't want to live life as "a log floating down the river," but we can't be happy if we always fight against the currents of life either.

My own guideline for balancing action with acceptance, is that in living today and in designing my future, I choose action. I approach life from the point of view that there is nothing that I can't accomplish. However, with regard to the past, I believe that graceful unconditional acceptance is the only path to happiness. As William Shakespeare says, "What's done is done."

I believe that the Serenity Prayer says the same thing, but I place particular emphasis on the point that everything in the past falls into the category of things we can only accept.

My article The Paradox Of Living In The Moment - How To Be Happy Today And Prepare For Tomorrow attempts to address the paradox of taking charge of our future while accepting our past.

Play to win, but be a good loser.
Have a plan for your life,
but accept whatever comes your way with grace and gratitude.
- jlh

Light and Joy...
Jonathan

Further reading: The Serenity Prayer - God grant me the serenity...

don Miguel Ruiz: Always do your best

Vince Lombardi quote: Winning isn't everything, but wanting to win is

Today is the bridge between acceptance and faith

Question every assumption and expectation. - Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Question every assumption and expectation.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The more you expect, the more you get disappointed in life.
- Anonymous

Be clear that expectations are demands. Demanding that life turn out the way we prefer is a sure path to disappointment and suffering. Happiness lies in having no expectations, and accepting life as it comes.

I need your help designing the future of Daily Inspiration. If you are willing, please read these questions and then leave your thoughts as comments on the blog post. If you prefer, email me your thoughts privately at jlh@sail7.com Thank you very much.

Further reading: Life will not meet your expectations - choose joy anyway - jlh

Anais Nin: We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are.

"Life is not supposed to be fair." - jlh

Monastery Housekeeping

Oscar Wilde quote: Morality is simply the attitude we adopt towards people whom we personally dislike.

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

I don't agree with the universality of this Ocsar Wilde quote, but there is a painful degree to truth to it. By all means have values, and support those values. However, be conscious of never mistaking the superficial differences of others as being an attack on your core values. Let your motto be, "Live and Let Live."

Some describe Oscar Wilde (1854-1900 Irish playwright, poet and author) as brilliant, others as snotty. Personally, I don't resonate with his style in general, but I find value in the following sayings.

The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
- Oscar Wilde

A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

A man who does not think for himself does not think at all.
- Oscar Wilde

An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all.
- Oscar Wilde

Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.
- Oscar Wilde

Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.
- Oscar Wilde

Everything popular is wrong.
- Oscar Wilde

Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.
- Oscar Wilde

Hatred is blind, as well as love.
- Oscar Wilde

I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

I am not young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde

In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane.
- Oscar Wilde

Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
- Oscar Wilde

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde

The Paradox Of Living In The Moment - How To Be Happy Today And Prepare For Tomorrow

The Paradox Of Living In The Moment - How To Be Happy Today And Prepare For Tomorrow
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Are you feeling stressed and upset? If so, you are worrying about tomorrow. Events that have already occurred may cause you regret, but they only appear to cause worry. If you just lost your job, you are not worrying about losing your job - that already happened. You are worrying about paying your bills and finding a new job. Those are worries about tomorrow.

Worrying is just a natural human emotion, and everyone worries, right? Actually not. Worry is a bad habit that most people acquire, and like all habits, can be broken.

When you worry about what may or may not occur in the future, you miss the joy that is available today - each and every day. So is the answer to focus only on today, and let tomorrow take care of itself? That sounds good - until tomorrow arrives and you are not prepared.

It's a paradox. How does one balance living in the now with preparing responsibly for the future? The key to this dilemma lies in the distinction between "worrying about the future," and "preparing for the future." The two concepts are not at all the same.

There are two aspects to preparing for the future. The one that is more familiar to most people is planning. You know the mortgage is due next week so you save the money - You know you want to fit into your clothes tomorrow, so you forgo that second helping. Planning for the future is fully compatible with living joyfully today.

The other aspect of preparing for the future is accepting that things will probably not turn out the way you plan. Creating this acceptance of life's uncertainties is much more challenging than formulating and following through on plans.

The source of most worry is a lack of acceptance of the uncertainties of the future. When one fully lives a life of acceptance, life's vagaries are not merely tolerated, but are enjoyed because they are life's gifts. If one is religiously inclined, whatever life delivers is a gift from the Creator. If one holds other beliefs, then whatever happens is just what there is to work with - so why not enjoy it.

The recipe for a joyful life is planning and preparing for the future, while simultaneously accepting that you hold virtually no control over future events. By placing no demands on the future, you can enjoy whatever it brings.

Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- jonathan lockwood huie

When I was very young, my mother gave me gold stars whenever I did something she liked. Usually they were small gold foil shapes with sticky backs, but Mother also saved some really big ones - three inches across - for extra-special accomplishments. Together with Mother's love, those stars made me feel special, important, and appreciated.

As adults, we are much more likely to receive criticism than appreciation. Our boss, our spouse, and the others in our lives expect much from us. When we fail to live up to their expectations, they criticize, but when we go beyond the call, or better yet do something delightfully unexpected, we are likely to get an "ummm..." response at best.

Appreciation, whether verbal or as physical shiny gold stars, is perhaps the greatest gift we can give to those around us. In the timeless How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie lists "Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation," as one of his fundamental principles.

When was the last time you offered sincere appreciation or a gold star? Perhaps it was recently. In a few offices, gold stars have become a common, if sometimes insincere, practice. Some on-line communities provide gold stars - or green stars or butterflies - for members to award each other. However, most of the time most of us fail to express our appreciation to those people who make our lives better in small, or large, ways.

Consider these ways to express appreciation:

1. Give someone a shiny gold star. It's only tacky or childish if your action is insincere.

2. Send a note of appreciation. Again, if it's sincere, it's always gracious and never inappropriate.

3. Speak your appreciation directly. Say "I appreciate what you did."

4. Say "Thank You" as often as you can.

5. Express appreciation for the person as well as the deed. "I appreciate YOU. Thank You for being my friend - or co-worker, or..."

Give somebody a gold star - Today.

Where there is no accusation of "fault," there can be no anger - jlh

Where there is no accusation of "fault," there can be no anger.
- jonathan lockwood huie

When I get angry, I am always angry AT someone - perhaps my friend or spouse, perhaps a stranger, perhaps the nameless "they" - "those people at the bank wronged me," perhaps God, or perhaps myself. In any case, when I get angry, I want to find someone to be "responsible" for what happened.

My window breaks. I want to know WHO broke my window. Who threw the rock, or who built the defective window, or who didn't prevent the hurricane or meteorite. America's penchant for filing law suits, along with untold misery, is built upon pandering to our instinct to blame someone whenever life doesn't occur as we prefer.

Life just happens - enjoy it anyway.

Stop Anger Before It Stops You - 7 Secrets - jonathan lockwood huie

Stop Anger Before It Stops You - 7 Secrets
- jonathan lockwood huie

Being angry is as close as a human being can come to experiencing hell on earth.
- jonathan lockwood huie

Anger is something that each one of us has experienced - some of us only occasionally, some almost daily. Can we eliminate all anger? Probably not. We will always have expectations, and those expectations will often be unmet. Disappointment is the principle cause of anger. When we are disappointed, we look for someone to blame. Declaring someone to be at fault is the nature of anger. Anger is always directed at someone - possibly God or the non-specific they, but some animate entity.

You've told yourself a hundred times that you aren't going to get angry - really angry - ever again, but wham, you start to feel that telltale heat, locked shoulders, clenched jaw, shallow breathing. Someone has just done something really awful and you are angry at them. What now?

Here are my 7 Secrets to Stop Anger before It Stops You:

1. Recognize when you are angry: It may not immediately occur to you that you are angry. You know that you have been wronged, and you can see everyone around you take a step back, but especially if you are really angry, it may take a while to gain the clarity to acknowledge your anger. Anger clouds perception and thinking, so make a special effort to spot it early and put it into words, "I am angry."

2. Breathe deeply: Concentrate on taking slow deep breaths. Sometimes this is all it takes to break out of anger and gain clarity on the issue. At other times, breathing deeply is just a beginning, but it paves the way for the rest of the secrets.

3. Focus your anger: Get clear what you are angry about and who you are angry at. Talk to yourself, "I am angry at Joe because he ..." Don't let your anger expand onto innocent bystanders, especially those trying to help calm you down. Don't refocus your anger onto everything that Joe has ever done or failed to do.

4. Remember that you are in charge: Anger is an expression of frustration and helplessness. Remember that you always have options - you can design your own life. No one can steal your happiness - unless you let them.

5. Look for the silver lining: There is a silver lining to every disappointment. Your boss fired you and you are furious. Probably it was a blessing. Now you have the opportunity to get a better job that you really enjoy.

6. Consider forgiveness: Angry and happy don't mix. Flush out the angry, and the happy has a place to put down roots. Forgive everyone for everything in order to give anger and resentment a chance to fade. Forgive and you can become happy. Forgiving is not a gift to someone else - Forgiving is our gift to ourselves - a great gift - the gift of happiness.

7. Accept that Life is NOT "Supposed to be Fair": Know that there is no single way that life is "supposed" to be. Demanding that life meet our expectations is a sure fire recipe for a miserable existence. Life is a game with no rules. Life just happens to us regardless of our best intentions. To choose happiness, be open to receiving whatever life throws at you - with Gratitude. Have NO Expectations of life.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: People only see what they are prepared to see

People only see what they are prepared to see.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Ralph Waldo Emerson: Nothing can bring you peace but yourself

Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Ralph Waldo Emerson: A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Friedrich Nietzsche: There are no facts, only interpretations

There are no facts, only interpretations.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

What we see depends more on ourselves than on what is "out there." We see what we assume (believe) will be there. We see what we expect (demand) to be there. We see what we fear will be there. And we see what we wish will be there. Then we label what we "see" as facts.

Wherever there are disagreements and confrontations, there are at least two perfectly valid interpretations that are vehemently labeled as "fact." Everyone considers "I'm right, you're wrong," to be a fact - the only difference is to whom "I" and "you" refer.

Never Let Anyone Get Your Goat, Push Your Buttons, Get You Riled Up, or Annoy You - 6 Ways to Cope - jlh

Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- jlh

Whether phrased as "push your buttons," "get your goat," "get you riled up," or "annoy you," it's no fun to be on the receiving end. How to cope?

1. Don't take it personally. Even when someone criticizes your actions or demeans your very nature, know that they are merely directing their inner turmoil in your direction. Someone else's opinion of you is mostly irrelevant, and basically none of your business. Don't assume that there is any validity to an accusation. Perhaps there is a valuable lesson buried inside the unkindness that merits objective consideration, but negative emotions are best just quickly discarded.

2. Look to the positive people in your life for support. If you balance many positive and supportive friends against one or two negative influences, it is much easier to cope. If you don't currently have enough positive people in your life, begin a focused effort to add positive people to your inner circle. If you don't have personal connections, search for groups of positive people at MeetUp.com

3. Remove negative people from your life. Yes you can, even if it's your boss. You don't need that job so much that it's worth your health or happiness. Everything in life is a choice. Sometimes making a change is important, while other times just knowing that you hold the power to make a different choice is enough.

4. Forgive the offender, not for their sake, but for your own sake. The act of forgiving releases your anger and provides space for rational thinking and action.

5. Be grateful for the wake-up call. Any time that someone or something grabs your attention is a good time to be grateful - even if the message is unpleasant. Something is happening that requires your conscious awareness. Perhaps you have a lesson to learn or an action to take. Perhaps it is time to remove another negative influence from your life.

6. Release any expectations that the unkind person should have acted differently. Life is not fair, and you only cause yourself unhappiness if you hold an expectation that life or any individual should be fair or kind.

Read Stop Anger Before It Stops You - 7 Secrets for more ways to cope with anger.

Anais Nin: We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are.

We don't see things as they are,
we see things as we are. - Anaïs Nin

See that large animal chewing its cud and saying moo... the black and white one, or maybe the brown one. What do you see? Perhaps an object of religious veneration? Perhaps a friend to be decked in flowers and led through the streets on parade? Perhaps a source of milk? Perhaps tonight's pot roast? These are all the same animal, the difference is in our seeing.

What we see is more a function of our parents, our childhood, our family, our friends, our church, and our community than it is a direct result of the object or action before our eyes.

Moreover, we see what we ASSUME we will see. If you believe the world is evil, you will see evil. If you believe the world is good, you will see good. To change how life looks, change how you see life - change your expectations of life.

Assumption, Expectation, and Anger - A Personal Confession

Each of us is burdened by an unlimited number of expectations (demands) that we hold for the actions of others. We know that there is a right way to do things, and are often outraged when our expectations are not met. Usually, we are unaware that we merely have a strong opinion and point-of-view - we are sure that we know how everything is supposed to be. The following is one of the many times when my subconscious expectations have been shattered.

Monastery Housekeeping

Several years ago on a trip to Tibet, I visited a mountainside Buddhist monastery nestled in the spectacularly beautiful vista far beyond the bustle of urban Lhasa.

As the older vehicle that passed for a bus struggled up the mountain switchbacks, distant views of the monastery repeatedly flashed into my view and then immediately clicked off as we twisted and turned. Finally, we neared our goal, and slowly approached.

I was excited and joyful to be visiting this highly revered sanctuary, as my already deep appreciation of Buddhist monks had been heightened by my experience in a Lhasa monastery, where I was nearly brought to tears by the overwhelming presence of five hundred deeply resonate voices chanting their passionate connection to humanity and to the infinite. I could still feel their commitment and compassion resonating through my bones.

As we exited the bus and started walking toward the rural monastery, I was captivated by the crisp cool air, the stark blue of the cloudless sky, and the splendor of the mountains. I moved away from the group and walked to the edge of the plateau to get a better view of the vista. Above, the intense sun punctuating the clear sky; to the right, a landscape of drought-resistant plants and dwarf trees; across the canyon, a couple of mountain goats foraging peacefully; and below... the most immense pile of trash and garbage I have ever seen.

I have seen the urban garbage heaps that are euphemistically called "land fills." This small monastery's heap fully matched a small city's repository in size, and the noxious smells wafting from the canyon surpassed those of most any urban landfill. There were bottles, there were Coke cans, there were rusted remnants of ancient machinery, and there was garbage - today's garbage, yesterday's garbage, rotted garbage, and very rotted garbage - with no attempt whatsoever to cover it, compost it, deodorize it, or camouflage it in any way.

In a split second, my assumptions and expectations shattered like a stack of plates dropped by a stumbling waiter.

Buddhist monks weren't SUPPOSED to do this! These were the people who revered all life - the people who wouldn't step on an ant. These were the people who meticulously preserved manuscripts for thousands of years. These were the people whose every day was scheduled to the minute.

After a few minutes I realized that the giant garbage heap was actually very logical. These monks were focused on the divine and on compassion for all beings; they had little concern for the affairs of the world. In my value system, "natural beauty" held a place of honor; in theirs it did not.

Exercise: Think of a time when your assumptions and expectations about something or someone were shattered. Was the experience devastating or educational? Imagine the power of seeking out some of your assumptions and expectations and intentionally blowing them up.

Say NO to the demands of the world

This week we continue with our overview of the concepts of Simply An Inspired Life (SAIL) by looking at CHOICE - the fourth of the Eight Points of an Inspired Life. You can find the previous issues of of our daily inspirations and SAILings... in our Archive. HERE ARE SOME PLACES MARY ANNE RADMACHER WILL BE SPEAKING AND APPEARING: There are more details and links on our web site at Events. November 5, 1 - 2 PT, Live radio interview with Catherine Bradford at Contact Talk Radio. You can listen on the web. The evening of November 13, 7 pm, I'll be speaking on LIVE BOLDLY at East West Bookshop 6500 Roosevelt way NE, Seattle, WA 98115 - Event Coordinator: (206) 523-3726 Ext. 312 Please "reserve" April 4 & 5 for a personal retreat with mary anne at the gaylord palms in orlando florida. The Simply An Inspired Life Discussion Group is now live. Our Discussion Group is the place where members support each other in Inspired Joyful Living. Of course mary anne and jonathan will participate in the discussions, and of course it is free. The Discussion Group is at groups.google.com/group/sail7 and there is a link on the sail7.com home page. Become a member and choose to receive emails of postings, read them on the site, or both. Then start posting - either by email or on the Discussion Group site More changes to the web site News is now in the Blog. There is a page listing 14 of Jonathan's favorite books. Jonathan's latest article is How To Be Happy - 7 Secrets for a Happy Life. Comments? - What would you like to see? Please let us know: do you like the web site changes? The articles? The quotes? What can we do to make sail7.com your very favorite web site and this your very favorite email - the one you recommend to all your friends? Please send your comments to mary anne (mar@sail7.com) or jonathan (jlh@sail7.com).

CHOICE - the fourth Point of SAIL I CHOOSE with Open Mind and Open Heart - I renounce all assumptions and expectations, and I declare that I will thoughtfully consider all possibilities. I will CHOOSE with courage, awareness, consciousness, and compassion toward all. Wake up to profound perspective that allows me to celebrate the choices of my moments, of my life. - mar Say NO to the demands of the world. Do we ever stop to ask ourselves WHY we "need to do" something? What is the "need," and on whose authority has the need been established? We disrespect ourselves and our free-will whenever we say that we NEED TO DO something. - jlh Everything we do is a choice! In every instant, we are making a choice about what we will do in that instant (as well as a choice about what we will think in that instant). We may choose to turn off and shut down our conscious attention, and allow the autopilot of our habits and instincts to make our choices, but they are still choices. I have no need to conform to the stereotypes others have defined for me. - jlh Your spouse says "You need to go to the grocery store today," and you say "I need to go to the grocery store today," or perhaps you say to yourself "I need to get a divorce." Look at all the "need to's." Who says so? There is no inherent "should," "must," or "need to" here. There are choices and there are consequences. The consequence of not going to the grocery store today may be eating peanut butter sandwiches or sleeping alone tonight, but there is no "need to."