Comparisons are odious

One of the greatest cause of unhappiness - perhaps even the only cause of unhappiness - is comparison. I remember as a young child hearing my mother say, "Comparisons are odious." That is one of the oldest sayings in the English language, and one of the most important.

Essentially all suffering is the result of...

* Comparing what we have (or don't have) today with what we had yesterday.
* Comparing what we fear we might have (or not have) tomorrow) with what we have today.
* Comparing what we have (or don't have) with what others have.

If I own two bicycles while my neighbor owns one, I feel rich, but if I own two bicycles while my neighbor owns a car, I feel that the world has treated me unfairly and I suffer. If I could only crawl yesterday, and can walk today, I am grateful, but if I could run yesterday, and can only walk today, I become angry and resentful.

The way to happiness is what I call Zero-Based Gratitude. Each day be happy and grateful for what you have, independent of yesterday and of other people. Think of Zero-Based Gratitude like zero-based budgeting, the process in which governments and businesses attempt to disregard the spending patterns they have become addicted to, and establish a realistic budget from a base-line of zero spending.

Further reading: Zero-Based Gratitude

7 Secrets of Happy Couples

GRATITUDE - the third Point of Simply An Inspired Life